Livin in Chi town

Why am I such an idiot...why do I always just leave everything behind for nothing. I left my family, friends, job, car, and school all behind! What am I doing with my life now?? Absolutley nothing! I'm constantly stuck in a house doing nothing. Can't go anywhere cause I have no car, or no money for taxi or bus. I had a great car back home and a job that worked out perfectly with my life schedule. I was going to school and doing something...Now I'm here in england doing absolutly nothing. No family, No friends (except Julia who I still never get to see because I have no damn money) , no job. I miss my life. I've been here 3 months now and done absolutly nothing. I can't even go back home because I told my dad I would never live with him and his wife again. Maybe I can live with my cousin. I need a job asap and money for this cruise we are going on in January. And then I need a car if I move back home. I'll start looking.